Tag: guilt

  • Keep in touch

    God, I hear Your still small voice calling out, “Where are you? Where have you been? Don’t you realize you need me?” Oh, I need You, yes I need You—every hour I need You!

    Liberty holding baby Elijah's hand
    Liberty holding baby Elijah’s hand

    Of course, I know I need God, but I don’t always act like I know I need God. It’s sometimes easier to go about my merry way and ignore the fact that I’m really not in charge. In fact, life doesn’t usually go as well when I operate as though I’m the one in control.

    “Spending time alone with Me is essential for your well-being. It is not a luxury or an option; it is a necessity. Therefore, do not feel guilty about taking time to be with me,” Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young.

    You, too, have decisions/choices to make. Big ones and little ones. But before any decisions should be made, I must spend time with God, in His presence, in His word. When I take the time to do this, I find guidance and blessed peace. Peace that this world can never offer me. Do you find this to be true?

    • Do you find it difficult to set aside time to meditate in God’s presence?

    • What truths did you encounter when you spent time with God and in His Word?

    “Come near to God and he will come near to you…”—James 4:7-8.

  • Endless circle

    “Will it hurt?” I ask
    He casually remarks,
    “Hopefully not;
    I’ve done this before.”
    “Well, this is my first time.”
    “Your finger’s quite swollen and red.”
    “Yes, it was injured.”

    A special tool
    Slices back and forth
    Vise grips pull apart
    The constricting band
    Leaving a noticeable indent
    Upon my skin
    I try to be brave

    Circle … broken now    
    Tears flow
    37 years ago
    Pastor raised this wedding band
    In front of God & witnesses
    “See, this ring has no beginning/end
    A continuous, endless circle”

    At this moment,
    there is a beginning & end
    Have I failed my commitment?
    I reason …
    ‘Tis only an object,
    a mere piece of gold
    With a touch of bling

    37 years mingled with …
    Joy
    Pain
    Doubt
    Guilt
    Elation
    Contentment

    Even though the symbolic circle’s
    Been visibly broken
    The severing cannot eradicate
    Blessings of children & grandchildren
    Adventures together
    Near-death experiences and
    Faithfulness within marriage

    The one who cut my ring
    Cannot take my soul or
    Erase memories
    It’s not really about the ring
    But about the person and
    Commitment to my mate
    And to marriage itself

  • Wanting just a little bit more – (Part II)

    Wise King Solomon wrote, “I said to myself, ‘Let’s go for it — experiment with pleasure, have a good time!’ But there was nothing to it, nothing but smoke” – Ecclesiastes 2:1 (The Message).

    That’s the trouble with taking matters into our own (incapable) hands. At first, it seems innocent enough but often with that first step begins a slippery, spiraling slope downward deeper and deeper. Deeper into frustration, guilt, anger, sorrow, and sin. In the end (and often along the way) a person is worse off than when they began to look and dream imaginatively about the object or person once craved. Life does not become better — just more complicated and people are hurt in the process.

    “I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my work, and this was the reward for all my labor. Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun” — Ecclesiastes 2:10–11.  

    Been there and done that.  There are times I wished I could take back the words uttered and the acts done. Trouble is: I cannot go backwards. My only choice is to move forward and forget the past. With forgetting the past comes asking God’s forgiveness for trying to run the show and do things my way. If only I had waited, God would have provided security, love, peace and confidence. I do have a choice: I can say I’m sorry to God and ask him to guide me next time. He’ll do that for me and for you. All we need do is call on him.

    ***

  • Spiritual Channel Marker

    A Native American elder was teaching his grandson about life.

    He said, “A fight sometimes goes on inside me between two wolves.  One represents evil: he is envy, greed, arrogance, guilt and ego.  The other is about good: he is love, joy, peace, humility, kindness, and generosity.  The same fight will sometimes go on inside you, and in others.” 

    “Which one will win,” asked the boy.  The elder replied, “The one you feed.”

    -traditional Native American story

    NOTE: I heard this same story told by a writing conference speaker and recently read it in a book I purchased over the weekend, “Soul Sailing: How Life-Stories Can Transform the Voyage,” by Jay F. Littell, Ph. D.

    I’m thinking there’s a message in here somewhere for me. Take notice: Teresa, of which wolf I feed!

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